Posts Tagged ‘airplanes’

If you are on a plane where you clearly know that seats recline, how can you be surprised when the seat in front of you reclines? And how do you justify being annoyed about it. Get over yourself, recline into the lap of the person behind you and read how stupid you sound on CNN [...]

Airlines seem to at least be getting the message that if you are obese and unable to fit into one seat, you are required to buy a second seat - preferably in the same row. But what about those tall people?  The ones you enjoy watching clip their heads on the TV and overhead bins when boarding. Two [...]

Boeing has reached agreement with Space Adventures Ltd. to shoot people into space -  okay, I meant fly people into space. They can take seven people and I’m already making my list.  Let’s see, there’s the creepy guy neighbor that stares at me in his long blonde ladies wig; the teacher/nun in second grade who was quick [...]

Kulula Airlines, based in Johannesburg, South Africa, definitely knows how to do it right. Their planes are painted neon green with instructional text and arrows pointing out components of the aircraft - like under the window where the pilot sits says The Big Cheese. And over on the co-pilot side of the plane, The other guy on the PA system.  [...]

So, you’re packing your suitcase … toothbrush CHECK, Playboy CHECK, Tiger HUH? What is this guy thinking? You can’t even take water through security and he thinks Tony the Tiger will slip right through.  Hey, relax, it was drugged… FOR NOW!  What about when it wakes up and wants his peanuts? Or wants to watch a [...]

You’ve got to love this screwup on a British Airways flight when the onboard computer accidentally announced they were about to have an emergency landing in the water. Holy Bejeebus!  And I thought the worst thing you could hear announced on a plane was that you would have to sit through an Adam Sandler movie. [...]

I was on a flight last week from LA to JFK when I noticed my seatmate downing more than her share of red wine.  I was busy playing games on my iPhone and had it charging in the seat charger.  When I got up to go to the restroom the drunken seatmate knocked over my [...]

This is the same guy who walks the wrong way through security and shuts down terminals. He’s a moron who is either unbelievably self-absorbed, or unbelievably stuipid. Who doesn’t know not to smoke on a plane? Can’t he just get drunk and pass out like the rest of us and not cause so much trouble? Perhaps [...]

“There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane.  Either you have diarrhea or you’re anxious to meet people who do.” –       Henry Kissinger This stage is a bit like going on a blind date. Who will my seatmate be? Will he be handsome, will he be rich? Will she [...]

And you wonder why people hate to fly. This US Airways flight was already delayed three hours because of mechanical problems – which on a hot steamy day in North Carolina I would suppose was pilot vs mint julip related. But I would be wrong because it was the crack mechanics who couldn’t get the [...]